These last couple of months have been absolutely exhausting. I am burnt out. I feel overwhelmed. And…I honestly have nothing left to give…
“God, why am I here? I know you have a purpose. I know you called me to this place…but is there no other way?”
As I find myself in this place of distress, all I can think about is our Savior in the garden called Gethsemane.
Then Jesus went with them to the olive grove called Gethsemane, and he said, “Sit here while I go over there to pray.” He took Peter and Zebedee’s two sons, James and John, and he became anguished and distressed. He told them, “My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.” (Matthew 26:36-38 NLT)
Pain is a part of purpose.
This is something that I am truly learning in this season. Yes, walking in purpose is fulfilling. Yes, it is a part of living a blessed life. But, walking in purpose is also painful.
It’s hard to walk the unpopular path. It’s difficult to go against the grain…especially when it’s your own desires that you have to lay at the foot of the cross.
Jesus, our Savior, showed us what walking in purpose really looks like…
The scripture says that He was anguished and distressed.
Yes, He wanted to fulfill His purpose, but…was there another way?
He went on a little farther and bowed with his face to the ground, praying, “My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.” (Matthew 26:39 NLT)
As I contemplate this place that I’m in, this scene of Jesus in the garden keeps replaying over and over in my mind. Almost as if the Spirit wants me to know that it’s okay.
It’s okay to be distressed in purpose.
I needed to know this, but I feel that I am not the only one that needs this reminder…
It’s okay to struggle as we walk with God. Struggling does not mean that we are out of His will. Distress does not mean that we are walking in the wrong direction. What if it’s quite the opposite?
What if this is the holiest place that we can be?
Imagine Jesus…
Exhausted from carrying the weight of the world on His shoulders…anguished ….distressed …ready to give in…
This is a holy moment.
Then an angel from heaven appeared and strengthened him. He prayed more fervently, and he was in such agony of spirit that his sweat fell to the ground like great drops of blood. (Luke 22:43-44 NLT)
It was not easy for Jesus to fulfill His purpose. And I know that we are not Him. But…in that moment…He was us.
He was human like you and me. He knew the pain that awaited Him on that cross. And just like us…He hoped there was another way.
Then Jesus left them a second time and prayed, “My Father! If this cup cannot be taken away unless I drink it, your will be done.” (Matthew 26:42 NLT)
And this is where I am right now….
In this holy place saying, “If there’s no other way, let your will be done, God.”
This season is painful…but this pain has a purpose.
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne. (Hebrews 12:1-2 NLT)
In the middle of the pain, Jesus made a decision. He chose to keep going. He chose to endure the pain…so that He could fulfill his purpose.
So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up. (Galatians 6:9 NLT)
Purpose may be painful, but there is always joy on the other side…if we don’t give up.
I have been in a stagnant place….a place of contemplation…
Can I continue on? Can I continue to do what God has asked me to do?
And honestly…I can’t. I don’t have the strength…I don’t have the will…I don’t even have the desire. But even so…I will not give up!
For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. (Philippians 4:13 NLT)
God arms me with strength, and he makes my way perfect. He makes me as surefooted as a deer, enabling me to stand on mountain heights. He trains my hands for battle; he strengthens my arm to draw a bronze bow. You have given me your shield of victory. Your right hand supports me; your help has made me great. You have made a wide path for my feet to keep them from slipping. (Psalms 18:32-36 NLT)
For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him. (Philippians 2:13 NLT)
But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint. (Isaiah 40:31 NLT)
It will not be by my strength, that I will fulfill my purpose…it will be with His.
I believe that He will enable me to do everything He has called me to do. I believe that He will strengthen me, as I fight for purpose. I believe that He will give me the desire and the power to do what pleases Him. I believe that He will give me the ability to run without getting weary. And when I can no longer run…I believe that He will enable me to walk without fainting.
His promises always prove true. He will not only enable me…He will enable you.
Are you in a place of weariness? Are you in a place where you feel like you can’t go on?
If so…you are in good company. Your Savior, Jesus Christ, was in that same place. He didn’t want to experience the pain, but He understood that the pain had a purpose. And I believe that this is what He wants me to highlight for you today.
We can’t experience the joy of purpose without first experiencing the pain of purpose.
Just think about it…everything beautiful was birthed in darkness. Before the earth was created, there was darkness. Before any vegetation came forth, there was a seed in darkness. Before we were born, God formed us in the womb…in darkness.
This painful season…this dark place…is the beginning of something beautiful that God wants to do in your life. So…don’t give up. Don’t allow your frustrations and your weariness to prevent you from experiencing the joy that awaits you up ahead.
Yes…this is difficult. And yes…you’d probably rather be anywhere else. But…this holy place was designed just for you…
So…run to your Father in this moment. Allow Him to strengthen you. Allow Him to enable you. He will give you the ability to do everything He’s called you to do. Trust Him with this season of your life.
Prayer
Heavenly Father, thank you for being here in this moment, and thank you for never leaving my side. Today, I have been reminded that although I may feel weary, and although this season may be painful, you are moving me further and further towards the purpose that you have for me. So today, I have decided that I will trust you with this season of my life. And as I continue to follow you, I pray that you would enable me to do everything that you have called me to do. Give me the strength to keep moving forward, Father. Give me the desire to obey your instructions, Father. And give me the power to do the things that I can only do with you by my side. I love you, Father. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Comments